Seriously

Does anyone ever stay serious long enough to finish a conversation with me?

Why do I scare everyone away?

My insecurities are showing and I don't like it.

I feel so misplaced and lost and alone.

I feel like I am Phoebe from friends jumping around left or ight not knowing what to do and where to go and what to do.

I am watching Bed of Roses to feel better right now and I feel as if the girl who is standing at the window is me. So much pain and saddness, so much turmoil of what to do and how to do it and how to handle things in my life makes my brain want to explode into a million pieces.

So much so my head ACTUALLY hurts...

LITERALLY...