Thursday, May 13, 2010

Realize

Some days I often wonder if he will ever realize how special I am and how awesome I can truly be. Some days I wonder if he will ever realize what a great girlfriend he has in me, how different from other girls I am, how supportive I am, how appreciative I am, how understanding I am, and if he will ever realize how open I am. Some days, I really wonder if he will see all the great things I know I am, I know I have gone through, and I know I can and will be.

Some days I think I will wait forever. Some days I think I need to wait more. Some days I think I am just waiting because he wants me to wait. Some days I think it is just like this story my niece told me...It was about a girl who thought her day would never come, he was never going to ask her to marry him, he would never realize how great she is and he would never realize that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her..in her mind she was beginning to think it would never happen...and then out of the blue he asked for her hand and she found out that all the time she had been waiting he was buying the ring, prepping for a home, getting his life together to be with her, all of this was happening behind the scenes she just didn't know.

So what if that is what is happening here? Do I want to mess it up by pushing,no. I told him I would wait and I will. It doesn't stop my brain from thinking, though. It doesn't stop me from wondering if I am what he wants or if he is still deciding. It worries me, seriously worries me that 3 years invested and he still isn't sure about a few things..

When will he know? How much time do I wait? Is he being fair?

The song REALIZE by Colbie Caillat was jsut palying and it really made me think about this.

Take time to realize,
That your warmth is. Crashing down on in.
Take time to realize,
That I am on your side
Didn't I, Didn't I tell you.

But I can't spell it out for you,

No it's never gonna be that simple
No I cant spell it out for you

C: If you just realize what I just realized,
Then we'd be perfect for each other

and will never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder if
we missed out on each other now.

V2: Take time to realize
Oh-oh I'm on your side
didn't I, didn't I tell you.
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by.. Didn't I tell you

But I can't spell it out for you,
no its never gonna be that simple
no I can't spell it out for you.

C: If you just realized what I just realized
then we'd be perfect for each other
then we'd never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder if
we missed out on each other now.

V3: It's not always the same
no it's never the same
if you don't feel it to.
If you meet me half way
If you would meet me half way.
It could be the same for you.

C: If you just realized what I just realized
then we'd be perfect for each other
then we'd never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder
Just realized what I just realized


When...when is he going to realize...when