Friday, April 16, 2010

In Love with the World

She was more in love with the world than anyone I have ever met before. She lived for life and love and happiness. She savored the world with every drop, every bite, every moment. She moved with style and grace and confidence. Her presences was alluring and when you were near here you were captured by her spell.

A moth to a flame knew better than those to come around her. The moth sees the shiny, bright light and moves toward it. I wonder if the moth knows the closer he gets the more likely hood he can get singed? If so, why does he still move towards it. Each time his wings get a little burnt, yet he continue to moves forward again each time burning off a piece of himself. But the glory of it all is that if he subjects himself completely to the light he will burn away his old self and become a new into anything he desires to be. He is not like the butterfly where cocoons and only has one choice but to become a butterfly.No, he can become anything.

She too is her own moth, yet she is in her own ever changing and growing world. She is a gypsy. She is a magician. She can transforms to become anything. It is only a matter of desire. If she chooses to stay stale and stagnant in her world she becomes disdain and unhappy. Through changes she becomes more amazing, more beautiful, more wonderful if that is even possible.

She makes you want to feel. to feel the world around you. She makes you want to taste it as she tastes it. Being drawn to her can be dangerous, but not being drawn is hell.

She wants you to be drawn to her. She wants to be wanted. She wants to be loved. She wants to be in the world. She wants to be of the world. She wants to live and to love and to be happy.

To be there with her in her world. The world of living and savoring life and it's preciousness, is heaven. It is like gambling and the one who is there is lucky enough to be chosen.

Saturday, April 03, 2010


So I realize there is a lot of change in my life right now. I have to keep telling myself a few mantras as a aprt of this change.

Asking myself, "What about this change is good?"

Remember to find inspiration
Be Brave
You can do it
I believe in me
Make a change resume: what changes have I been though, how did I handle them, how did I want to handle them, how do I view them, did I overcome, how did I overcome, what lessons have I learned

Also I have developed new mantras as well that are a part of this change process (hmm process, I keep thinking in Visio and think maybe I would benefit from a a process flow chart)But I digress...

1- speak less listen more
2- remember to be nice but not too nice
3- i do not have to be in control all of the time
4- let others speak for themselves
5- others will ask for help when needed, if not that is their own fault
6- being submissive is not so bad, in fact I like it but not all the time
7- remember to be true to myself

1- make a positive difference in the lives of others I come in contact with
2-follow through with changes above
3- keep your eye on the goal
4-make money while i sleep (research and consider stack able income)
5- get financial stable
6-rebuild credit history
7-be emotionally strong and stable
8- strive to be better
9-become toned and fit

And I always love myself so I can love and care for others

Friday, April 02, 2010


I feel like I am growing and chaning so very much sometimes it almost frightens me. Others say this feeling is growing pains but who knows. IDK.