Wednesday, April 20, 2016

What Love Really Means - Honestly and Truly

Years ago, many many, even when I was in High School. I begged the Lord to send someone who would TRULY love me for me. I cried many tears. My journal has many tear stained pages. Not for who I planned to be, who I wanted to be, but who  I was, then, now and forever. I never ever thought it would come true.

I married my first husband and had two wonderful children from him. Though we argued and he was abusive as was his family in many ways, I knew he was not the one for me. I jumped into another relationship and was sorely disappointing.

Then time , space, the time I needed to do things for me. From 93 to 97 I was alone. I dated but never found anyone that met the qualification. only one...someone to love me for me.

In 1997 I found my second husband and we were married for ten years and suffered MANY many trials. We lost homes, apartments, cars, children, dignity, sanity, humility, we lost it all. We struggled and tried so hard to endure but after ten years, we both just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't be the wife he wanted and nor did I want to be. I wanted to be me. Honestly and truly.

In 2007, we broke apart and  not long after I met two wonderful men. One who was not ready for me nor I him. But there was something about him. The other man and I hit it off very well and I dated him for years. We had so much in common, we both loved art, we both loved comic books, we both enjoyed each other's company. He had fun together and when we were together physically, nothing could interrupt us. We had such a strong physical connection that neither of us had with any other and it drew us together. But as much as we tried, we were never fully right for each other. We constantly broke up and got back together. It tore us both apart to be away from each other, but eventually we both ended up leaving the other and suffered the pain and anguish that caused, but we both knew we needed to move on.

And then, HE showed up again in my life. The other man I met in 2007. We were reunited as friends in 2010 and hung out and went to concerts together and was there when the other needed a shoulder to cry on.

After the final breakup of me and my boyfriend, I needed to heal. I needed more time. I knew there was this other man that COULD be the one, but from all the baggage I was still carrying in my past, I needed time to fully heal.

When the time was right, I started dating him and time and years went by and I was blessed to be proposed to in 2-14-14 and we married in 8-15-15.

I call him HunEPants and he calls me HunZPants.

We are that couple that makes you want to barf because we are so cute together.

But the things that makes me love him the most is how he loves me.

Honestly, Truly, Wholly and most of all...


I am so blessed to have him in my life and so blessed to finally know what love really means and finally have someone who loves me for me. Every part of me. He loves me not in spite of my baggage and trials I have been through, but BECAUSE of them.

Thank you Lord for giving me someone who loves me for me.

Xo, Trisha Trixie

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