Saturday, September 15, 2007

What a week

This has been a crazy week lately. Issues with a Professional organization I am a part of. Someone walking out. Friends being in the middle. Another friend calling srying over parental issues. Car shopping. Bill paying. Busy at work. Parental guilt issues on my side. And then...my son...again.

N failed his poly AGAIN. I don't even know if I know what to feel or think or act. I am currently looking at a car and having it checked out. while I am waiting they have the internet. After this is over then I am going to see N. I don't know what to say to him. I don't know how to act. I don't know what to do. He says he isn't hiding but the Polygrapher asked him mutiple questions this time and he failed all of them. It IS scientific which is why they use it so why did he fail all of the questions? I don't know. All I know is I moved here for him. I uprooted my life for him. I live for my kids and the never ending story is that you sacrifice your life fo ryour kids and they don't appreciate it and don't understand until they have a life of their own and get hurt themselves.

I have no clue how my visit will go. I had no original plans to go see my mom last night but changed things around. I had no idea nate was going to take his poly but he did. I had no idea he would fail but he did. I had no idea that this weekend I would end up feeling hurt all over again.

I better sign off soon as the keyboard is very cliky and I think I am driving the other guests crazy with my typing. I will update you further on the visit.