Wednesday, December 14, 2016

Happy New Year Chemo!

Oncology Update: Chemo starts Jan 9th, 2017...Happy New Year.

Oh yeah I get to do 12 rounds for 6 months every other week. One Chemo week, One "normal week" then ...a Chemo Week again and so on and so forth yada yada beetlejuice

December 19th I have my PET-CT scan to establish a baseline.
December 22nd I get to go to Chemotherapy Class!!
December 23 my port gets put in
and Then...January 9th, I get to start a long day 4-6 hours of Chemo! Woo hoo! How exciting! Doesn't that all just sound fabulous?

< in case you were unaware that is the my version of sarcasm>

So, with all that, I am running away to see my mother. I leave for New Mexico on December 28th until January 4th. That will give Hunepants a break before i really will need to rely on him. He agrees.

so, you are wondering...how am I?

Welllllllll...I'm sad.

I talked to my exspouse Scott and he said "That is not a term I remember ever seeing in you the ten years we were married? What does SAD mean to you. Explain."

I chuckled and explained...

Not that anyone really WANTS chemo, that of course wasn't what I was rooting or hoping for. I had all this research and basically was told those are great, but you still need to do chemo to make sure the microcells we can't see that MIGHT have cancer in them, are killed so they don't grow up and become bigger badder meaner cancer.

I now have all these appointments from now to then, and the start of my 2017 is starting with having to be on Chemotherapy. :(

I DON'T want to scream or shout or yell at the world and I have no desire or inkling to yell at God, My higher Power, or The Universe because well, it's not their fault or anyone else's really (with the exception of the idiot doctors in Iowa who could have caught this sooner had they listened to me and just done the damn colonoscopy years ago when I asked), I just am...I don't know, I feel sad.

That;s it.

Just sad.