Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Being Alone is Easier
Being alone is easier I think. I am a people pleaser and so I want to make others happy. If I chew too loud, giggle too much or do something that doesn't please another I do my best to try and fix it or better words would be to fix me.
As I sit here in Smokey Row licking the jelly off my fingers, not caring what others thinks as I even try to lick the jelly off my arm as it travels near to my elbow I think back to the video Ms. Sassy gave me that I postd in " Its ok to be alone" posting not long ago.
As I look around I got a few people smiling at me and some giggling at my antics. It then made me smile and I thought to myself "You know, Trisha, you forgot how fun being alone can be!"
There is no one here to tell me I am being immature or that I am allowing to make me feel bad. I am njoying my bagel and enjoying how funny it is to catch this jelly slithering down my arm and fingers. There is no one here to give me a look of dissaproval or make snide remarks to me.
I forgot what is was like to be free. I forgot what freedom aloneness can give me. I forgot what it feels like to be me...
Don't doubt that the lonliness ensues in me and I desperately want the right person there. But until that happens I am enjoying my aloneness..
...That and my jelly arm ;)
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